We Are Only Surviving Emotionally When We Should Be Thriving
Most of the time when we read anything about survival or thriving, we often think about our finances, about how much money we are making. Today, I like to discuss why it is important to thrive emotionally.
Our emotions play such an important part of our personal development. It comes from a body of energy that simply is about energy in motion. However, what kinds of energy is in motion is as important to our wellness, as it is what kinds of food we feed our physical body. Just as we shouldn’t consume junk knowing that it doesn’t do our physical health any good, we shouldn’t be consuming junk emotions as well.
I have a tendency to avoid people or interact with people who are loaded with junk emotions. They enjoy and thrive on this, and pulling everyone down the dark path with them as well. In the wellness sense, they are only surviving — often drowning in negativity — this includes negative thoughts.
Several years ago, I told a sociopathic person that it is pointless to pretend to be friends. I have drawn the line very clearly and I feel there is a better use of my time and energy than to cultivate a friendship that only serves his need. This quote comes to mind: "Some people aren’t loyal to you, they are loyal to their need of you. Once their needs change, so does their loyalty" This is a good reminder quote everyone!
Just so we are on the same page, I’ve talked about this in previous articles before, but I like to remind everyone — that our emotions/feelings are caused by our UNCONSCIOUS thoughts, this means they are mostly in the shadow side of ourselves. The emotions are locked in our bodies -- and a big part of that is in our physical body, which holds all the emotional memories of our past. And if we are blind to these emotional reactions and triggers and we attempt to bury them further, our body has a way to show us how much we have stuffed things down through disease of the body, mind and spirit. To thrive emotionally and to master our emotions, we truly need to bring our unconscious to the light, bring them to the surface of our awareness so that we can thrive.
Let’s talk about emotional wellness and when we are just surviving. How do we know if we are just surviving?
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When we are drowning in negative emotions, overwhelmed by them
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When we cannot feel any emotions and we feel numb
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When we don’t know how we should feel and positive feelings seem so foreign
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When we enjoy soap operas and we get entangled with life dramas and gossips
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Our immune system is closely tied to our emotional well being. If you often catch the flu, common cold or cough, upping your positive emotional quotient with self love will serve you very well. Instead of just surviving, aim to thrive in love
How do we know we are thriving in emotional wellness?
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When we know how to avoid certain situations because we see so clearly how it will turn out, and it is not worth the time and energy to go into it. Moreover, it may cause us to spiral downward
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When we see clearly our own weakness in a situation, and we dig deep to unearth the stuff we have been avoiding, process the emotions in a safe environment (preferably with a therapist) because we know that on the other side is more light. When we look at our dark stuff in the eye, it often has lesser power over us, and we are able to empower ourselves
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When we are open to learning from others, without fear of embarrassment, and we understand humility and humbleness
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When we are are in touch with positive emotions and our go-to safe space are feelings of abundance, joy, generosity, peace, serenity and so on (this is the epitome of thriving emotionally)
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When we are ok not to join the majority and mass behaviour or herd behaviour of other people, including social groups and simply thrive in our own space of positive thinking and emotions. (Not joining others emotionally, does not mean not joining them physically, we could be enjoying the same activity eg dining together, but doing it on a different emotional level)
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We are thriving when we do not need the approval of others, we remain unaffected by the negative talk about us
I hope you are inspired to thrive emotionally so that peace of mind is yours to stay. Next week, I’ll share more about why it is important to thrive emotionally.
© 2019 Shamala Tan © Edited April 2022 Shamala Tan
Let me know how I can assist you if you have any questions [email protected]
Shamala Tan is an author, spiritual entrepreneur and healer. Her work focuses on transforming the lives of others on the spiritual, emotional, mental and earthly level.
One of her success stories as an author is to being featured alongside New York’s bestsellers Sonia Choquette, Robert Allen, Arielle Ford, Marci Shimoff as well as Christine Kloser in the book Pebbles In The Pond.
Shamala’s clients include small business owners, holistic practitioners as well as those seeking to find more significant meaning and value in life. Shamala offers laser coaching to her clients on a one-to-one basis or in a group environment, offline as well as online.