We often find ourselves holding onto grudges, unable to forgive either ourselves or others. This strange attachment can become a significant burden in our lives. Holding onto past hurts and resentment only keeps us trapped in a cycle of negativity. It’s important to understand that letting go of grudges is not about condoning the wrongs done to us but about freeing ourselves from the chains of bitterness and anger.

The Imaginary High Ground

Our sense of righteousness can make us...

In our journey through life, we often encounter emotional storms—those periods when feelings become so intense they threaten to capsize our inner tranquillity. The secret to weathering these storms lies NOT in battening down the hatches and denying the weather but in embracing a deep sense of awareness.

This profound insight, advocated by spiritual teachers like Eckhart Tolle, is more than a meditation practice—it's a transformative life experience. I personally have sailed...

In the vast expanse of human emotions, there exists a silent but potent enemy: denial.

It's a defence mechanism that many of us employ, often subconsciously, to shield ourselves from painful realities. The quote, "One of the easiest ways to fall into the trap of mental disorder is to be in a state of denial and pretending everything is normal," sheds light on this perilous path. Let's delve deeper into the implications of this statement and understand why denial can be so detrimental to our...

How often do we feel entitled to be rude when we're unhappy about something? It's as if unhappiness grants us permission to behave like brats. Unfortunately, this attitude is all too common, especially in restaurants where people become nasty when they don't get what they want. But should money really buy manners? Perhaps a little more courtesy would go a long way in solving these problems.

On several occasions, I've found myself apologizing to wait staff on behalf of my friends or family for...

Mental health is at an all-time low as a collective in the world. 

For spiritual people, I have found this to be the most troubling: our spiritual practice/tradition/culture has given us space to bypass mental health needs with spiritual quick fixes (either by praying your problems away or meditating them away). And if we are honest with ourselves, they don't go away no matter how much we pray or meditate about it. 

Then what is it that we really need to do: Face them, of...

One of the biggest downfalls in our human history has always been humanity's choice to go for the path of least resistance resulting in the lack of independent or critical thinking. And simply going with whatever is told to us.

I know this sounds harsh but perhaps instead of jumping to react to what I just said, ask yourself: why are you even reacting to what I just said (i.e. if you felt a reactionary knee jerk sensation in your stomach) 

What does it mean to think...

Only hurt people hurt people, as the saying goes. People who say hurtful things to you whether intentionally or unintentionally come from a place of pain. BUT, it is also important that we check inwards to see if we have projected our pain onto them.

When I work with my clients, one of the first things we do is to turn inward to empower self i.e. the client. People may have said or done hurtful things to them, but ultimately it is the healing process that is the focus.  So likewise, in...

Overthinking. Many of us have indulged in this every once in a while. For some of us, more than others.

Overthinking has been known to be associated with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), anxiety and depression. And sometimes, we can go on for decades overthinking as a habit, if it has not been brought to our attention that it is actually not good for our health.

We take for granted that it is a normal thing to do. Think, think, think. And to overdo it without restraint, like an...

We are works in progress.

This is the whole point about our human lives, working in progress. The problem with the world is, we want to see in ourselves and others, on the extreme ends of the spectrum. We want to see or label ourselves or each other as success or failure. When truly, we are mostly within the spectrum of works in progress.

When we introduce someone or we ourselves get introduced to an audience, we are often labelled, this is Mr or Mrs XX, a successful XXX. And when we indulge...

It's been said that you can't teach old dogs new tricks. As my dog gets older, he's behaving like an archetypal middle-aged man, grumpy and stubborn. People say that about people too that as we get older, we become fixed in our ways, but is this really true?

I would like to think that as people, we are better than that. 

Have you read the book Mindset? The book explains that there are two kinds of mindsets - the growth mindset and the fixed mindset. However, the fixed mindset can be...